Augustus John

Too much!

Posted on July 22, 2019

I’m getting fed up with all the articles about Nudism and what difficulties are being encountered by individuals to practice being naked. Just how difficult is it to take off your clothes? It’s not as if it’s a dangerous sport or a drug-infused past time! As if you didn’t know, it’s harmless and doesn’t cause any harm to animals! So, you are not enamoured with your body? Too many bulges and sagging skin. Your breasts are trying to meet your knees. Your penis is fast disappearing. You’ve got hair growing all over the place (even more in your nostrils). We’ve all got problems. And the older you get, the more you seem to have. The answer is simple!

Firstly, decide where you want to go naked. When you’ve fixed the ideal location go prepared. If it’s in your own garden, warn the neighbours what you intend doing. If it’s in a public place (the beach or park) take care to be circumspect. Always take towels so you can cover yourself if necessary. Never uncover your genitals using a raincoat! If the neighbours object you can always ignore them, tell them to emigrate or set the dog on them! If they seem to warm to your intentions beware, they may want to join you and even build a door in your fence so that they come through already naked.

It can be made even easier if you ‘splash’ out and buy a hot tub. Then there is no excuse for having hordes of friends who ‘all of a sudden’ want to visit you laden with towels, bottles of cheap plonk and sporting a big busted blonde to have an orgy of sex underwater. Don’t, whatever you do, put up a sign outside your house displaying ‘clothing is optional here’. You will attract every sex-starved male and female from miles around. Mind you, that could have its attractions!

May I wind up this little tale by advising any male or female who has got it into their heads to go naked. Just do it!

7 thoughts on “Too much!”

  1. Well I’ve done it! I’ve taken the plunge and told a new set of neighbors that I’m a nudist. They moved in just before Christmas and they comprise of a busty blonde of about forty years of age. Her husband is about the same age and looks fit. They have two daughters aged about sixteen years of age and dangerously attractive.
    Strangely enough they didn’t seem at all fazed at my confession and said they looked forward to the Summer when they might see me naked in the garden. I said that i hoped they might join me! We’ll see……………….!

    I’ll let you know if they do!

  2. The main issue is that most of us want to do it without upsetting the neighbours. Some also have the law in their respective countries to worry about – happily there are fewer such countries than most believe.

    I hope you feel better now you’ve got that off your chest – I smiled when I read “Never uncover your genitals using a raincoat!” – it is such a cliché isn’t it! I also liked your comment “it’s harmless and doesn’t cause any harm to animals!” somewhat reminiscent of the famous quote by Mrs Patrick Campbell: https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Mrs_Patrick_Campbell

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