Patrick Thompson

When we were at a bleak, windswept, rainswept caravan with our cousin, way back in 1966 it seemed like an adventure and so very different. For many reasons this holiday was not like any that I imagine my school pals would be having. There was mam,my auntie, my sister, my two female cousins & myself. Yes I was the only male! yet even at 15 years old this did truly feel like a memory in the making. It was the end of August and we were about 20 miles south of Scarbrough on the Yorkshire coast of England. Around us there were around 50 other similar metal & plastic 'mobile homes' which each slept around 6 people in what could only be described as 'very basic comfort'. There was only washing facilities in the communal blocks, likewise the toilets. The nearest to us contained 8 showers, 4 urinals & 4 toilets. (washbasins were there but in a cracked & unusable state) I reckon that at some point the partitions between shower cubicles had been effective, but that could have been several years previous!
No, this was not a naturist holiday resort, so it was usual to see two people at each shower point at any time, one would be wrapped in at least 2 towels, the other would be on 'Guard Duty' to stop unwanted prying eyes seeing the towel bearer getting showered! This is where being the only male in a group of 5 females became very interesting. When I stood guard for my sisters shower I handed her soap, shower gel, shampoo, towels etc all at the bemusement of the female attendant (Who took 2 shillings per shower person)When I later returned with my 17 year old cousin on her shower adventure I once more undertook the soap, gel & shampoo duties, once more gaining bemused looks from "Mrs 2 shillings" as she became! The smile on her face seemed to morph between a smile & an awkward sneer?
Half an hour later I would arrive with my younger cousin on her shower trip, once more I was assigned the duty of guard in charge of soap, gel & shampoo. Though I tried not to look too interested in all these naked women I was attending, I seemed to be causing the beginnings of a fever on the brow of "Mrs 2 Shillings".
She seemed relieved when I declared I had no more young female relatives to guard or look at naked ablutions of them. The almost stunned look on her face though when I arrived with my mother was classic & almost hysterical, my mother cast off her towel as she paid her 2 Shillings and stepped naked into the dilapidated cubicle. In turn I supplied the requisite toiletries & "Mrs 2 Shillings" looked almost at boiling point and searching for words in her spittal laden mouth & throat. When I returned later with my auntie there was almost a look of purple rage on the "2 Shilling" face! She put her hand palm up and said "NO!" spluttering she rasped "You must not watch the showering women anymore!" My aunty was silent & motionless, I stepped calmly forward, I put the 2 Shillings on the dish by the cubicles entrance, the glare and staunch rigidness of "Mrs 2Shillings" was reminiscent of some stalag commandant. Much to her shock it was I that stripped naked! I handed my towel to aunty and said, "Just gel & shampoo please when I am wet!"
Is it possible to see a fuse blow in a matronly woman?