April 29, 2014 in Uncategorized
Ok seriously. I just wanted to update those folks who might want to see my kegerator. Too bad you are not local, because I would welcome you to my garage for a cold beer. Anyway i just wanted to show you the old 1970's junk refrigerator a good friend gave me.. Thank you God for the Grain you provided.
There are 3 photos on my Flickr page. Enjoy.
Other than Beer making I love film Photography. Someday I want to do some Nude Pinhole Photography... Someday.
I built my own 4x5 pinhole camera. Here it is..
other than pinhole, I shoot 35mm, Medium Format 6x6, 6x7, 6x9, but really love the Mamiya RB67 and the Hasselblad 503cw. Love that Zeiss lens. Upgrade to film... ;))
April 27, 2014 in Uncategorized
Friday night our friends invited my wife and I over to their home. My friend Tony was letting us try his new Double Pale Ale. It was awesome. My wife and I are taking a financial course by the famous Dave Ramsey, and another couple from the class joined the beer tasting after the class was over. All 6 of us were sitting around the fire pit drinking this new beer. Tony and his wife know that I am a Naturist, and are accepting but they haven't taken the plunge yet, but there was a new couple there. We know them well but they didn't know about me being a Naturist. So, we were chatting about different stuff and Tony pipes up and says..."Hey, there's a Nudist beer and wine festival in Pennsylvania in about a month, are you planning on going ?
The other couple was like laughing hysterically...because they thought Tony was kidding around..
I was like What? Cool !! LETS GO ! It's actually near Boston...
The other couple was like Yeah..Right!! Who would ever do that!!??
Then I told the other couple sitting across from me that I was a Naturist. YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THEIR FACES...
SHOCK, HORROR, AND AWE, all wrapped up in dismay....hahahaha. LOL. It was so funny, the dropped jaw and open mouth.
I wish someone had snapped a photo.
I then went to explain that I am a biblical naturist. Having arrived at Naturism via studying if it was ok for me to do based on being a born again christian. You could have heard a pin drop.
After the conversation they were very accepting. It's so funny to me when I tell people. The reactions are just funny to me..
It strikes me as strange that Nudity is so taboo. Even they considered it at first to be wrong based upon their own definition, because in their mind they immediately saw nudity equal shame.
Its so interesting that people equate these two things together, but that is what the textile world has created.
I was also disappointed that we didn't all get in the hot tub... maybe next time. z
and the beer was pretty amazing. A Belgian Wit, and a Double IPA with 7.7 ABV. yum.
April 16, 2014 in Uncategorized
we were at the beach on Sunday. It was beautiful ! 87 degrees. I put on a few pounds over the winter and had to "fit" into my textile swimsuit. It always sucks fitting into my swimsuit on vacation. I was lying on the beach with my wife, telling me not to flash my crack to those around us.. LOL. I just wanted to strip off my swimsuit, but I am sure that someone would become offended and dial 911 and the fashion police would have showed up.
My 9 year old son, because of the sand in his swimsuit rubbing in his crotch area, had developed a rash and was crying it hurt so I had to go fetch some vaseline to rub on his rash. I said to my wife, "you know if he didn't have a suit on, he wouldn't have got a rash in the first place".
I got the look like I was an absolute freak.
When we arrived back at the condo, I was taking a shower to rinse off all the sand and sweat, and my son comes in the bathroom. I told him to come into the bathroom, strip, and I was getting out of the shower, and he could just jump in and take his shower, without me turning off the shower and all that. He says....absolutely not ! Dad you might see me naked.
At 9 years old...he is over conscious about being "naked"..
What the Hell !! ??
How as a parents are we in America creating this fear of simple nudity? It's just absolutely stupid and it is damaging. How do you convince people of healthy nudity when they are so opposed to something they have never experienced?
January 12, 2014 in Uncategorized
Has your spouse ever told you, that you need to change your interests because you are embarrassing them?
My wife did that to me tonight. She was pissed off that on my Pinterest account I have the Board "Nudist Camp".
She came to me tonight pissed off that Nudist articles are showing up on the main Pinterest board where all of our friends are connected. My friends. Her friends and our friends. She is embarrassed and asked me to stop pinning nudist articles. "like, you are ruining my social status by making me look like I am married to a freak".
All of her friends are her social circle friends at church. So they see my pins and have told me in texts that they thought I was an Upstanding Christian Brother. Now they think I am some sort of pervert/letch. I have explained to them in person and via text what Naturism is all about, and to ME there is nothing sexual about it. But they believe what they want. I don't really care. I am responsible to no one except my creator. I was kind of hurt that my wife sides with her friends instead of me, but she has low self esteem.
I think it's wrong. What if I said to her, "you need to stop wearing your hair like that because my friends are offended by your hairstyle and you are embarrassing me"....I would never say that...because one, it's wrong and hurtful, and that just sounds ridiculous. What makes people be so cold ? I never said this to her, because she would strike out in hatred.
My Spouse has never tried Naturism and thinks its ridiculous. She is very militant about it, instead of just maybe learning about it and letting down her guard and trying it, she constantly complains.
I will continue to make posts but I changed my Nudist Camp post to Naturism. I hate having to change for other people's prudishness, but in the end its a word. A title. It doesn't change me, and I can live with it. More people should try it, but they all live within a mindset of shame. It's hard to change other people from the outside. It has to come from inside them. They have to want to experience new things. But being Christians they just believe that it is shameful, yet will not open their mind to anything other than what they are told.
I was trying to explain to her, that a place where you share in social nudity, friendships you make seem much deeper than I have ever experienced. I feel so much in tune with others. I see past their exteriors and past all the Textile fronts that allot of people live behind. I said its different than any other relationships. She then was very condescending with me telling me that relationships are all the same whether you are clothed or not. Amazing that I thought she could have such insight into Nudism/Naturism that she could see both sides of the experience without having experienced it...ever. I just stayed calm. She was looking to start a fight tonight. I wasn't going to step into any traps. No thanks. Slam goes the bedroom door. I'm on the couch nursing my bad cold.
January 7, 2014 in Uncategorized
The day after my Double Dog Dare foray out into the World and the next morning I was contemplating my stupidity, but laughing because of how ridiculous it was. I was no 20 year old anymore, but being nude and outside was pretty freeing, it just felt good.
This was quite a departure from my normal self. My entire adult life I hid my body. I was ashamed of it. I hated myself. I had a food addiction. I Loved food especially carbohydrates. I ballooned in size but it was so gradual that I took it for granted. I kept buying bigger clothes so I would fit into the World. I was addicted to sugar. You would think that sugar couldn’t be a drug. But when I ate it, it gave me a peace and escape of my mind from a childhood trauma, from shame. It was my attempt to cover up my shame. The fatter I got, the more I ate. It seems ridiculous now. Yet I still battle it in my life. It’s always there in my reflection. When you are heavier people look at you and think you are stupid. They treat you differently, they don’t see who you are, they see WHAT you are. You are classified as a thing. I felt the stares. I felt the disapproval of people. I felt it all, but I looked away. I felt the hurt. I pushed my shame inside. I was convinced that emotions were not to be felt. So I never dealt with it. They were to be pushed inside. People with emotions are weak, is what I use to tell myself. In the textile world, everything is covered, and if it’s not covered it is exposed for an affect to promote the body as a sexual object or at the very least an object of desire. An objectification, an object of Pride. What I have and you can’t have. A social status, I was this intelligent professional who was very good at what I did. I had a passion for it, yet my life was out of control. Body size defines you. I started not to fit into a normal sized world. Chairs were tight, so I didn’t put myself into situations where I would go out and socialize. I wouldn’t do the normal things that normal people would do because I didn’t fit into a normal size World. I pushed the World away. I became a loner. I pushed people away, because I was damaged. It was easier to push the World away then change. In the textile World everything is how you look, it’s what you present to the World as a façade. I have commented before that Women compare themselves to fashion magazines. It becomes second nature. Pride of Self, and how and what you are because of your social status and your looks is what drives people to be more beautiful. Vanity. It is poison. People do it all the time. We don’t even think about it. I think as a Man, I used the “stuff” I owned and what I did for a Job to define me. It is all a lie. My stuff and my job don’t define me, yet that is what I presented to the World. Every New Year especially in the United States people constantly ask you what your New Year’s Resolution is. For a majority it’s to get healthy. But I think that is a lie we tell ourselves, to try to fit into a World that is driven by beauty. That New Year’s Resolution is really just a way that we push ourselves to change so we fit into a new social positioning. I fell into that trap. Lose weight so I can look alright on the outside and fit into clothes that define me for who I projected into my mind that I wanted to be. Instead of just loving me and taking care of my body and being secure and loving others and putting them first and letting go of the things in my past that were damaging me in my present. The World is Vanity. The body is the vehicle by which the object of Vanity is created.
Nudity equals Sex in the Textile World. It is a standard in the World. We are bombarded with it every day. Television, Magazines, Advertising, Porn. It’s everywhere. It’s the things that you never question. It’s just how it is. It’s even worse now that the internet and social media is such a “norma”l thing now. Being just naturally nude in the United States is equal to in many minds as crazy and perverse. You are a pervert and people ostracize you. Yet the opposite it true. It is perverse to take something that God created and called Good, and turn it into something it is not. It is the biggest lie that people buy into the world over because of Pride. A clothed world, where what you put on and how much money you make defines your status in society. It’s been a lie even to beginning of time. What you wore was your social standing. Rich over the poor. Textiles define you. It made me feel like a prisoner.
I started to think that I wanted to get over the hatred of myself. I wanted to get away from the social status effect of the World. I liked how nude felt. It was a release and letting go of a faulty belief system. It let me leave behind the feeling of being confined in clothing that told me I was a thing.
For most of my adult life I would not let myself be seen by others. We would be on a vacation and be at the beach and everybody would be in their swimsuit and I would make up any excuse not to go. I would be in shorts and a t shirt. I knew inside I was not beautiful. I was fat. I was disgusting. I hid my shame.
The only reason I felt comfortable when I was nude in my backyard that night before was because I was hidden by darkness. I was revealed to the World and nude, but covered in darkness so even with alcohol I felt released from guilt and hatred. I felt free. It’s addictive to feel free. You just want more and more. But drowning my shame in alcohol to feel free is just another self imposed prison.
For the next week I when I took the dogs outside before going to bed at midnight. I would let them out to do their business, and then lock them in the bedroom. I would go back to the sliding glass door and slip off all my clothes and with the lights off in the house, I would go stand on my patio. Nude, but clothed in darkness. It was something that I craved. To be clothes free. It was like a release. I even walked around my yard. It felt wonderful. When you have been clothed your whole life, and feel the restraint of clothing, taking that clothing off, it feels so nice.
I knew the week before I had lost my nerve to go to a Naturist resort. Not only was it being nude, it was being nude in front of others. Terrifying to think about. Nothing to hide behind. No social status, just all my imperfections out in the open for everyone to see and judge me. All the club advertisements Frequently Asked Questions highlighted “What if you get an erection”. I think the mentioning of it, made me think I would. What that term really defines is the general idea that being Nude is equal to a sexual connotation. The two were intertwined. Society’s long standing definition of nudity is a sexual connotation. This foray into an unclothed paradigm I had to force myself to shed that belief system.
So I checked the weather the night before and called the camp 2 days before to check the protocol for showing up. I asked my wife one more time if she had changed her mind. Nope. You are brave, but you are crazy. Auggie sounded very normal. Told me to ring the bell at the gate. I remember packing my stuff in the car. Towel, cooler, beer, a nice healthy salad & SPF50. I felt like a kid heading off to my first day of school. Nervous Butterflies, but open to a new experience. Maybe I would walk in and everyone would look at me and crack up. Maybe nobody would be there. Maybe there would be 100 people there. Maybe I would walk in and it would be like that famous E.F. Hutton Commercial, where everybody stops what they are doing and they turn around all at once and just stare.
My mind raced at the possibilities. I quit thinking about it and just concentrated on the road. It was 25 files to the camp. http://www.sunrayhills.com/
As I got closer and closer I felt nervous relief. The unknown is always scarier that it actually is in real life. You get to a point in your life and you just realize that.
A winding highway, I could see the sign in the distance. Well here goes. My right blinker came on in an act of determination. I was committed. The driveway was over a mile long. Beautifully paved. Through green farmer’s fields and beautiful meadows, around corners and shaded tree shadows I had arrived at THE GATE. A gated community. What was so secret that they had to have a big giant blocked view gate like Mad Max and Thunderdome? How dangerous was this place that it was separated by the World by a giant gate? I rang the bell, and the giant gate started to open. I drove in and parked in the visitor spot. Just as I turned off my car an elderly couple drove by in a golf cart. They were completely nude. That was just odd to see. I had never seen anyone ever on a golf cart in the nude. It just took me by surprise. When had I ever seen nude people on a golf cart in my life… yeah never. They were friendly and waved. I chuckled to myself. I really wished at this point that my wife was there so we could have just laughed our asses off. Nudist camps are social and I had no one to share my experience with.
I signed in with Auggie and he did my background check. Looks like you cleared Greg. He gave me my day pass and showed me where to park my car. I remember parking my car. I opened a beer, and guzzled it down. I was hoping it would calm my nerves a bit. I got out of my car. The pool was about 150 feet up the hill. It was a hot day. Sunny and blue skies. Hardly any wind. It was absolutely beautiful. I open my back door and took out my cooler, and started to take off my clothes. What a weird feeling that was. When have I ever stripped off all my clothes in daylight in a parking lot in broad daylight ? NEVER !! I was completely nude. Other than being nude and free, was the feeling of the warm sun on my ass and back. It felt better than I could have ever imagined. Why did I wait 47 years to experience this? I will remember the awkwardness of walking up the hill completely nude in my sandals pulling my cooler with my towel over my shoulder, and feeling the warm wind and sun. It was amazing. I approached the gate. There was a couple by the pool. They were unclothed. This is the point I felt the most naked. They didn’t bat an eye, but instead just said hello and went back to reading their paper. After a little while, the wife introduced herself and I mentioned it was my first time. They were the nicest people I have ever met. They didn’t see me for who I was on the outside, they just talked and treated me like what could best be described as family but not in a family judgmental way.. I was there at the pool for about 9 hours. In that time I met others who were singles and couples, and everybody was so nice and gracious. I have never met people and been so welcomed in all my life. The love that emanated from these Nudists was nothing that I have ever experienced anywhere in all my life. They made me feel like I was part of their family. They saw me as I truly was. Who I was on the inside and not who I was when I wore my textiles. The most difficult thing for me that first day was being nude and breaking the belief system that nudity doesn’t equal a sexual encounter. The World teaches you that by making you stay covered. By staying covered the World makes you define nudity as a sexual experience, because you are nude when you bathe or when you have a sexual experience. Other than than that your brain in never taught to comprehend that nudity is anything else. So when seeing Naturism, your first thought of people being nude in a social context is just a sexual reference. All my friends when I told them thought I had lost my scruples because they only have one reference for nudity. SEX.
I am so very glad that I pushed myself to discover Naturism. The more I go, I feel as though I do not want to live in the Textile World anymore. It is full of filth. In my heart I am now a Naturist.
My next blog will detail my entrance into the world of Naturism and my Lifestyle choice of being a Christian.
End. Thanks for reading.
January 6, 2014 in Uncategorized
We were talking last night. My wife and I. I tried Naturism this past summer. She was afraid to go. Said she couldn't participate because she didn't feel pretty enough. She said, "I am ugly, I don't look like the pretty women in the brochures. I'm old and flabby, and unattractive". I told her it wasn't about being pretty. She truly sees her self worth through the beauty compared to other people. She is 49. I'm coming up to 49 and there is that terrible thing called gravity. Smile) It's what it is..
She is stuck like I was before I went, focusing on the Nudity part. She is stuck on the self hatred induced by how her Textiles fit her, how they define her. Self hatred because she compares herself to the World. I just want to free her from that self hatred. How both of us can be healthier and love who we are instead of putting on that textile facade. It truly is a liberating thing. Textiles are so ingrained that until you feel life without them, you live in them in a prison, but you don't know it because you have been in it your whole life. It is this simple thing of stripping off your clothes. Something so simple, that most of society thinks is perverse, can reset you to heal. That's what I want for me. That's what I am hoping she finds out.
One of our friends is an Anorexic. I keep telling her to try Naturism. She thinks I'm nuts. I tell her it will reset her thoughts about food, about her body, her mind. She focuses on the nudity part. She only focuses on "People will see my private parts". She doesn't see it from the inside and how it will change her for the better. I think she also sees it from me...as this guy who might have other motives. Which is not the case..But, I wish I could go scream it from the rooftops. The demystification of the body, and what we adorn it with, actually hurts us. I wish, I wish, I wish.. That people could stop equating nudity with sex. That to me was my mental barrier. That is so ingrained in society that it is a huge sticking point. Solve that, and the tide will change with how people see Naturism. Easier said than done.
January 3, 2014 in Uncategorized
I was on vacation in Clearwater Florida. My wife and I, and her extended family and the kids meet every year to vacation to get out of the long Wisconsin winter. It was about day 4 of 7 and I had cabin fever and decided to go for a walk. I grew up in St. Petersburg, Florida, and my Grandparents lived in Clearwater. Clearwater Beach is absolutely beautiful. The Clearwater Beach is known for it's white sandy beaches and draws huge vacationing crowds from all over. It was a hot day. Probably 86F. I went for a nice stroll on the boardwalk by myself. It felt so good to be out for a walk. I had enough of wives, and children and noise, and needed some time just to go and do some film photography. I enjoy street photography and decided to get the heck! out of the Condo and just listen to myself think and breath and relax. I went for a nice walk about ¾ mile down the boardwalk and then turned around to come back. Almost to the condo, there was a huge crowd of people near the intersection that had crossed the road. The crowd passed me on the boardwalk, and then a woman was walking toward me in slow motion it seemed. She was a brunette, and she walked with purpose. She was walking right through me, dressed to kill. She was wearing a very revealing string bikini that was actually transparent. Being the always on guard married guy that is pretty jaded, she passed me by and spun me around. There wasn’t much material walking away from me. She was beautiful, yet it wasn’t her beauty that hit me right between the eyes, it was the lack of swimsuit material that was glaring me in the face, and not being a prude, it caused me to question why society is the way it is. I sat down at a beachside bar and pondered why we wear what we wear and why.
In front of me was a group of spring breakers playing volleyball. Everybody was playing and having fun. Around them in the hot sand were parents and children, frolicking and having fun soaking up the hot sun. Some of the swimsuits were super revealing, some were not, some of them reminded me of frilly underwear, but nobody would ever wear underwear at the beach, right ? Would they ? What is the difference between a swimsuit and underwear? I mean, they are almost the same. The only difference between a swimsuit and underwear is really location. Would a business woman park her car on the street and strip down to her underwear and walk out onto the beach in a bra and panties. No. People would be like…what ?!! Location really determines what is acceptable in society. If someone were to wear underwear at the beach, people would probably call the authorities or at the very least wonder about their modesty. A swimsuit is basically stylized underwear. Bright colors, meant to cover the genitals and breasts. The only reason that people wear swimsuits at the beach is that what society deems as appropriate. Different societies have different expectations. I then started to question why we feel the need to cover up. Why do we cover up ?
What is the purpose? That is what started the question in my mind. That started me questioning what I had been taught from a young age. Why does society (my society) require me to cover myself when everyone knows what is underneath. That is what started me on my journey this past year. Thank-you lovely brunette translucent bikini wearing woman. Thank you for walking by me with that ridiculous swimsuit and making me question society’s norms and what I believe. You have given me a great gift.